An Apology

I often take the opportunity to view my blog as the ordinary person sees it when looking in.   Now in this blog page I expect to see my most recent blog at the top, but recently there was what was called a 'highlighted blog' which remained at the top and put the most recent blogs into second place.   It was easy to remove, but I wondered who had managed  to do this.   I had such a highlighted blog before, which I left there while I thought about why someone wanted such a  blog to be highlighted.      The key was that they were controversial blogs.   I eventually came to conclusions about both of them.   The first blog, was on the subject of a college being removed.    It was more a report than my ideas, but I concluded that I had nothing to be ashamed of in writing this blog, so eventually I removed it.   The second and very recent was on Cafod and on reflection I felt ashamed that I had written it.   It was dated 2016, and I mention talking to a priest and then attacking Cafod for doing nothing about Christian Martyrs.   I cannot remember the conversation with the priest, and even writing it, but the post is there, in my style, and  I did.    So what kind of mood was I in, had anyone in Cafod annoyed me in any way, was I just in a 'sod someone off mood'    O yes, in the past I have had plenty of these.    But the truth is that someone had done me a great favour, for I was given a singular grace to dwell on my faults about three years ago.   No in a confessional way, but just looking at myself and realising the person I am is not the person I want to be.   So I am now trying to be that person.    And it is difficult, so I welcomed the highlighted blog as a sign that I still have a long way to go.    But why pack on Cafod?    I will be honest here.   About 40 years ago I had great difficulties with Cafod as an organisation and struggled to show charity towards the people at the top who were running it.   But 40 years is a long time, and the organisation has changed and there are some wonderful Catholic people giving so much of their time for God and their neighbour.   I have no doubt that on reading the blog they would have been deeply hurt.   So my apology is unreserved.  

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